The Black lagoons Grim Reaper
by redbird691
Summary: Naruto is the chosen warrior of Kami and is given eternal life and the ability to travel across dimensions. Why? To have fun and get a better life. To help him she gave him a doujutsu Godlike/Relaxed/Naruto, No harem, but Naruto will flirt and eventually have a girl friend, you should be able to tell from the describers, follows Black Lagoon Manga
1. Chapter 1

**(Hello people it's redbird691 here again, this is an idea that he been going through my head for a while, so let me start off by saying this, Naruto will act kinda like Shika only he will actually love action and won't hesitate to get into a fight, he'll also have a doujutsu, which i will explain at the end of this chapter, a little back story, Naruto was chosen by Kami(female) to travel across dimensions and have fun, which he is, she gave him many gifts, a doujutsu, and 5 different fighting styles that he now uses, the Charge style (my own creation) allows him to vibrate the molecules in his body, to the point where when he punches he makes a sonic boom that can hit his opponent, Kung fu, you know how it works, Capoeira a fighting style that incorporates dance, The Slash Style, which allows him to focus energy into his sword blade, and release it in devastating attacks, and finally, he was taught the ways of the destructive blade, turning the wielder's blade into a blade of pure energy that can decimate a target.)**

Held hostage, alright Kami this is a new one, out of all the traveling Naruto has done, never once has he been a hostage. A little back story was necessary to understand how he got he got into this predicament. He originally thought Kami was giving him a break dimension, working at a desk job, mingling with the locals, and getting a paycheck. Little did he know that he was about to be on probably the craziest and most badass adventure he'd ever be on. Now once Naruto got to this dimension he realized how boring people are, so for some form of entertainment he learned how to shoot any kind of gun. Revolver, repeater, smg, burst rifle, sniper rifle, you name it he can shoot it. Later on in his life, he was contacted by his boss telling him he was going to be the negotiator for a big shipment their company was supplying. Thinking it would be better than the cubical Naruto agreed. 5 hours after they leave, they get "attacked" by "pirates" saying they've been hired to pick up a disk on the ship. There were two pirates one a big black man with shades, a green vest, black muscle shirt, black pants and black boots. He looked like he worked out if his muscles were any indication(seriously those things are the size of small melons). The girl was, in one word, hot. She had long slender legs, wide hips, C-cup, borderline D-cup boobs, dark skin, and long brown almost purple hair tied into a loose ponytail, she was wearing a black, tight fitting sleeveless shirt that cut off at her stomach, extremely short shorts, barely covering her ass, and black boots. The black man was holding a remington 870 marine magnum in front of his face, and the hot girl was holding a modified beretta 92 to his face. Naruto had a bored expression on his face as he was looking down the barrels of these guns. The black guy was saying shit about if they call the feds then they'll kill everyone on the ship, blah, blah, blah. Naruto was about to return to his cabin for a nap, when the hot girls stopped him saying "where the fuck do you think you're going?"

Naruto turned to look at her, she was still holding the gun, one of two y the way, to him, he replied "I suspect you're done here so I'm going to take a nap (think of Naruto as Shika light, he'll be lazy and smart, but he'll also have moments when he can get serious), but you appear to have other plans for me." Naruto stretched his arms over his, showing off his well built bi/triceps, and yawned.

"You're damn right I've got plans for you, you're coming with me buster." Said the hot chick. Naruto shrugged, and went with the woman. She took him back to her boat, where he was just sitting quietly listening to the two people who were on the boat argue.

"Why the fuck did you think it would be a good idea to bring this guy with use Revy?" said the black man. To which the now named Revy replied.

"I don't know Dutch, maybe it's because Balalika is gonna screw us on the deal, were getting $20,000 out of this, that chip is worth $30,000 this guy is just extra incentive, maybe 15,000 for him." Naruto let out a snicker, turned to Revy and spoke.

"I'm sorry, Revy was it? But you don't seem to understand Japanese corporation bosses, if one of the fish dies, they leave it to the sharks, they aren't gonna pay you to have me returned, sorry." Naruto shrugged and tried to have a nap. That is until Revy unloaded some of her bullets near Naruto's head, not one of them hit their mark. Hearing what Naruto just said, made Revy pissed, Dutch wasn't too happy either, Revy would have kept shooting, but Dutch had her in a hold.

"O.K. Dutch I get it."

"Get what?"

"I'll calm down."

They looked back to their hostage, only to see he wasn't there. They were shocked and moved to the hatch, only to see it close shut. Dutch made a dash for hatch opened it up and saw the hostage sitting on the port of the boat, just sitting there. "Don't worry." said the hostage "I won't jump! Just taking in the smell of the sea. You don't get this smell in Japan, ya know."

"True, true." Dutch said with a nod. He went up to the hostage sat down and brought out some smokes. He offered one to Naruto, he took it, flicked his thumb, and lit up. "How'd you do that?" Dutch asked.

"Sorry but I don't trust you enough with that information, maybe after I'm officially left to the sharks, and we get to know each other." said Naruto after taking a pull. The cool thing about Naruto was he couldn't get drunk or wasted, so he could drink and smoke all he wanted with no drawbacks, like cancer, or alcohol poisoning.

"I can understand that, can I at least get your name?" Asked Dutch taking a whiff from his cigarette.

"I suppose I could give you that, seeing as we'll probably working together, name's Naruto Uzumaki." He finished giving the two finger gun salute, and a smile. Naruto looked out and saw they were about to land. He flicked away his cig and said "I need a drink, know any good bars around here?" Naruto asked Dutch, and got a smirk.

"I know a good place, come on." Dutch said walking to the gangplank. They walked for a while till they came to a bar(don't know it's name) and walk in, and start drinking. Dutch tried to get more information out of Naruto but he was a tough shell to crack "you sure you won't tell me anything Fox?" Naruto gave him a weird look about to ask what the nickname was for when Revy knocks his glass to the side with cup of Bacardi

"Can't get drunk on beer, rum's for real men. But seeing as you worked at a desk job you probably can't even handle 2 of these." Revy started laughing, but stopped once she saw Naruto take the whole thing in one swig. He looked at her with a feral grin. He slammed the cup on the table and both he and Revy said "Bartender, keep the Bacardi coming!" The rest of the bar heard this and started chanting "Drink, drink, drink!"

After ten minutes of drinking, Both Naruto and Revy have had more than 20 shots of Bacardi. They were working on their 25th shot when the two grenades came through the door. "Duck and cover!" Shouted a random civilian. Everyone found cover, except for Naruto. He finished his shot, put down the glass and ordered another. That is until the glass got shot, this pissed him off, nobody and I mean NOBODY messes with Naruto and his alcohol. He calmly got up turned to see people shooting through the wall, sighed and using seals tattooed to his side he summoned twin katana's and got a bloodthirsty look in his eyes, and a feral grin of his face. He dashed towards the closest gunman, who was about to shoot him, cut the barrel of his gun, then cut him diagonally in half. He turned, rushed to the next guy, sliced him into tiny pieces, and said "Come on, can't you guys give a man a challenge!?" HE then went on with his killing spree.

"What the hell's going on?" Asked Dutch who had gone to the back to make a call.

"Me and whiskers were having a friendly drinking contest, when these assholes, came in and broke his shot glass, he then went ballistic. I've got to admit, I'm starting to like the kid. HEY Whiskers leave some for me." Shouted Revy as she pulled out he cutlasses.

Naruto looked back at Revy and got an idea, "Why don't we make it a challenge, who ever can kill the most men, has to buy the other a drink?" Naruto finished with a foxy grin. Revy contemplated and gave a why the hell not and started shooting guys up. "Better hope you can kill fast, i'm already at 8!" Naruto shot at her.

"No fair you got a head start, take a ten second break!" Naruto obliged, hey any excuse to get more drinks, he appeared at the bar and asked for more rum. Revy then went to work on the army men. Naruto took his drink, and got back into the fray.

Dutch got fed up with hiding and yelled "Revy, Fox were getting out of here." Reluctantly both stopped their fun and made their way out the back. On his way back Naruto noticed a revolver lying on the ground. Not wanting a good thing to go to waste naruto picked up the Taurus Judge Magnum, opened clip and saw it had 3 shots left in it, he put it into one of his side seals, for later use. Once they got to the car, Naruto asked "How many?"

"Heh 20" Said Revy with a smirk.

Naruto only chuckled "23, you owe me a drink." Revy yelled "FUCK"She opened her window and chucked a grenade. "those guys were probably hire by me ex-boss to get the disc and kill me in the progress." As they drove off they didn't realize the leader of the army men emerge from the burning bar.

"Well looks like I'm gonna have fun tonight." Said the commander. He took off his glasses and made a call for a helicopter.

Once they got back to the boat, they took off and headed to their drop-off point. The next morning Naruto was having a drink with Dutch. "damn the water looks like crystal in this light, must be cool waking up to this sight every morning." Said Naruto taking another swig of beer.

"It's nice, with the sun right there waking me up. But they must have some good scenery back in Japan, right." Asked Dutch.

"Nah nothin this good, sure you got mountains, forests, but the smoke clouds clog it all, nature at sea is the best." replied Naruto filling up his glass. "I'm gonna go get some fresh air. Talk to ya later Dutch." Naruto made his way to the hatch. Stepped out on the deck, he saw Revy inspecting one of her Berettas. It looked like this would be a lazy ride, that is until Naruto and Revy heard the whirring of a helicopter blade. They looked up and saw the guy who was commanding the assault on the bar. "Well fuck." said Naruto and he ran back to the hatch to alert Dutch of the situation. "Dutch you do realize they we have a helicopter tailing us right?"

"Yeah Benny just alerted me about them, looks like we're in one hell of a pickle." Suddenly the helicopter started firing on them. "In coming, Revy get in here."

"Where the fuck did these ass hats come from, there were clear skies a few seconds ago?" Asked Revy as she got in the hold. After trying to turn around, only to get shot at, the boat was now in a channel. They passed a half sunken ship, Naruto made a comment "This place should be called no mans land. Cause no man comes out alive." They hit a dead end and Naruto brought up "Well the way i see it, we've got two options; one) sit here and rot, or two) think of a way to get passed them."

"What can we do, we got nothing to fight back with." Inquired Benny.

Naruto sat in a meditative pose and used something he never thought use for a long time. He used a doujutsu given to him by Kami, The Eye of True Sight, it allowed to see anything and everything, now anything and everything, he could figure out how to get out of any situation. After a few minutes, he opened his eyes to see the rest of the crew giving him weird looks. "I'll explain later but right now, I have a plan. But you may not like it, this boat was made to hydroplane right?" Naruto said looking at Benny.

"In theory yes, at top speed were only in the water a few inches, why?"

"Simple we're gonna invite them to a game of chicken, Dutch are the torpedos primed?" naruto said with a smirk.

"Yeah, are you suggesting that we hit them with a torpedo, don't know if you've noticed, but they're kinda in the air."

"The half sunken boat back there is the perfect angle for a ramp. We hit top speed, jump the ship and nail them with a torpedo. Hate to say it but that's the only option we've got."

Dutch contemplated it for a few minutes, took a smoke,lit up , and said "That is the craziest plan i ever heard."

"Crazy doesn't mean bad." returned Naruto.

"True, alright, Revy got a sniper and get ready to invite them to play." Revy nodded and went to get the sniper. "Fox, grab a flare, if they fire rockets fire it away from the ship." Naruto nodded, grabbed a flare, and went outside.

Moving at near top speed, Fox(is what i will call Naruto now) had the flare gun in his left hand, and Revy had a sniper in her hands. "Alright it's a game of chicken, Revy come invite them to play." Revy took a few shot at the copter, all just glancing off the sides. The copter shot rockets at the ship, Fox shot the flare, the rockets followed. "Alright now lets get back inside." Said Fox and hey headed back in. The copter started to speed towards them. Dutch hit top speed, jumped the ship, and said "Fire#1! Fire#2!" he pulled 2 levers on the dashboard, two torpedoes fired one missed, the other made it's target. The torpedo exploded, and Fox gave a fuck you, and flipped the bird. "Brace for impact!"

At dusk the Black Lagoon crew was looking rather disheveled, Dutch approached a striking blond woman with a nasty scar on her face, but in Fox's opinion made her all the more sexy. Dutch handed over the disc and said something that Fox couldn't hear. "Hey Revy, who's the hot blond?"

Revy looked at fox with a black face, "Her name is Balalaika, she's the current leader of the russian mafia, all you need to know, and that if you try to hit on her, or you'll disappear of the face of the Earth." Naruto filed that little nugget in his head for later reference. Naruto didn't know why, but Balalaika reminded Naruto of someone, but he couldn't put his finger on it. Fox then heard his old name called.

"Come on Uzumaki, aren't you coming?"

"Hey, "boss", you said it yourself didn't you, I'm already dead. By the way, the names Fox now." Said Fox as he took off this tie and lit up a cigarette.

Foxes ex-boss said nothing and just drove off, and Balalaika drove up next to him and through an open window said "glad to know that you won't be working for that Japonski, but where will you go now?"

"Да очень хорошо" (translation: I'll work something out, comrade) said Fox in fluent Russian.

"Вы говорите на русском?" (translation: you speak Russian)returned Balalaika

"Да очень хорошо" (translation: yes very well) Replied naruto with a smirk

"I look forward to working with you in the future лиса(translation: Fox, pronounced lisa) said Balalaika, in english now, as she closed her window and drove off.

Fox turned to the Black Lagoon "well looks like I'm out of a job. Oh woe is me, whatever shall I do?" Said Fox mockingly

"Well, i know of this one company, they're in the shipping business."

"Who sometimes break the rules to put food on the table, I hope to God their hiring" Said fox as he finished his smoke. "Well if i'm gonna work with you, you may as well know everything about me, I already know all about you."

"Really, and how did you come to obtain this knowledge. Most of it was classified" asked Dutch

"Well lets just say I have my ways, I'd rather not go into it, you woiuldn't believe me any way." said Naruto and they all walked back to the HQ

******(Well time to explain Fox's doujutsu, his doujutsu is The Eye of True Sight, as explained it tells him anything and everything, and he can now anything and everything. This includes peoples pasts,he knows where his crewmates come from, and their baggage, and he respects them and won't tell anyone about them. This is also why he could speak russian fluently. Next time we'll have ching's trap and we'll see Fox fight with out his swords or guns. Cya)**


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

**(let me just say thank you to all of you who reviewed my story, it means alto that people like my story, and now I'll respond to some of them.**

**Scarface101: I'll see what I can do, but OI think I can find a way.**

**Blood enraged: good idea I'll go back and fix it.**

**and to all who wanted a new chapter here it is.**

"Attention asshats on aboard the St. Jones, you are currently under siege by the The Black Lagoon trading company, you have something we require. Our demands are simple, turn off your engines and through down a ladder, failure to comply within 3 minutes, will result in your ship getting blown the fuck up by my friend with an RPG here, and be warned she has an itchy trigger finger, your 3 minutes start now." Finished Fox, as he lowered a megaphone and took a seat next to Revy. "How'd I do?"

"You were good, you sure you were a ninja and not a pirate. I can tell you'd make one hell of a pirate." Replied revy as she steadied her aim on the St. Jones. Fox checked his watch and counted down from 5.

"Well Dutch, have they complied?" Asked Naruto after he counted one.

"Nope, let Revy take the shot." Said Dutch into his blue tooth.

"Gotcha, Dutch said you can shoot now."

"About damn time." Revy smirked and took her shot. The grenade hit the hull of the ship, and all the men aboard were panicking. 'til Revy's voice came from the megaphone, "Alright, assholes my rockets can move faster than your ship and if you think of sending a distress signal, we'll be out of here faster than they can respond. So stop your engines or else." Revy turned off the megaphone, and waited. Naruto then grabbed a pair of binoculars and gave a snicker. He handed the binoculars to Revy and said.

"Little white flag, just off the port side." And true to his words, there was little white flag, hanging from a rope just off the port side of the boat. After taking their loot the Lagoon returns to Roanapur. Roanapur the city of thieves, murderers, and cons. It was home now, not that Fox was complaining, he felt a change like this would be good for him. Only problem, there was nothing to do, absolutely nothing. It was soooo boring. That is until Naruto talked to Balalaika and asked if there was anything she needed. She told him there were people that Hotel Moscow had some bounties that needed to be taken care of. Naruto decided eh what the hell. Soon after killing many a people Naruto had a reputation around Roanapur, he was like the grim reaper, killing anyone who has done wrong, and has a sizable bounty on their head. Now Naruto liked having allot of money, who doesn't, but he wasn't too greedy, he shared some of his money with the Lagoon, under the alias Not A Regular Uto(see what i did there).

And that's what brings us to this situation, NAruto was about to take his last bounty when his cell phone went off(he got one from Balalaika once he started taking bounties, easier for the Lagoon to get in touch) Alerting his target of his location. Acting quickly Naruto went in for the kill. With a heavy sigh Naruto answered "This better be good, you almost cost me a bounty Dutch."

"Sorry Fox, but we've got a new delivery to make. Revy's screaming at me to tell you to wear the shirt she bought you." Said Dutch in his regular calm, cool, collective voice.

"Yeah well tell her she can kiss my fine ass." Naruto hung up the phone.

Naruto used a shushin to "teleport" to a few blocks from the HQ. He saw the guys getting into the car. He picked up the pace and jumped on the roof, He peeked down and said "Yo", scaring the shit out of the people inside.

"Don't do that, the next time a bullet's going through that head of yours." To prove her point Revy pulled out her cutlass(one of her guns) and poked his head with it.

"Oh Revy, you poor, poor fool, you couldn't shoot me if you tried." Said Naruto as he jumped through the window and landed on the seat. "What's the job?"

"Simplepickup job, we'll tell you once we get to the ship." Dutch told Naruto

Naruto nodded and was ready to take a small nap. That is until Revy poked him and asked "Hey Fox, where's that hawaiian shirt I bought for you."

"You mean the incredibly ugly one, I wouldn't be caught dead in that thing, wearing it should be some sort of punishment." Said Naruto

"What's that supposed to mean, you saying I have no taste?" Said Revy pointing her gun at Naruto again.

Naruto gave a heavy sigh and kept his mouth shut, and looked out the window. He decided it would be a good idea to catch up on his sleep. After 30 minutes the car came to a stop. They got on the boat, Naruto got out his headphones and ipod and listened to Shoot me by Royal Republic. Everything seemed to be going well when his doujutsu alerted him of the oncoming threat. He opened his eyes suddenly and ran for the deck. Revy and Dutch looked at him weird. They followed him up only to see 7 speed boats coming towards them, fast. The looked at Naruto, who had a fox like grin on his face, and his two swords drawn. 'I still don't believe that he can call those things at will just by touching his sides' thought Revy "Revy, I think these asshats need to be taught a lesson don't you?" Revy then got a feral grin on her face

"want to make a little bet again? who ever gets to the boat in the back wins" Asked Revy as she drew her guns.

"You must really like buying me drinks Revy." Naruto said turning his head to her. He had his usual flox grin on, and she had her feral one. They looked at each other, no uttering any words, they crank their music, and get to work.

(POV Revy)

I jump towards the first boat on the right, grenade launcher in one hand, Uzi in the other. I start tearing these fuckers apart. Dipshits dropping left and right. I finish the first ship with 9 kills, I then jump for the next boat and start tearing their shit up, I fire a grenade to the boat across the way, there was no boom. After killing 12 more guys, I make my way to the third boat, after killing 4 guys I through the uzi overboard, then I hear the explosion of the grenade, I pull out my cutlass and start shooting. I killed 10 bitches on the third boat and when I make it to the oat at the back, Fox wasn't there, but a quivering Ching was. I waited a few seconds and heard the sound of feet hitting metal,I look over and saw Fox half covered in blood, and damn if he didn't look sexy before he does now. He looks up and sees me pointing my cutlass at Ching. He yells a loud FUCK, puts his swords away and stomps off in huff, I got myself a few free drinks and got to kill Ching, all in all a good day. (little does she know its about to go to shit.)

(POV Naruto, before revy wins)

I leap off towards the first boat on the left, both swords drawn, and started cutting these shitheads to pieces, after cutting 12 people down I rush to the front of the boat and jump to the next one. After killing 5 idiots, I hear Revy fire a grenade towards the boat I was currently on, without even thinking, I turn towards the grenade, use one of my swords as a place to rest my arm, I kick the grenade under the detonation point, and have it sail off in the air towards the third boat on my side. After killing the other 10 fuckers on this boat I jump high into the air and met the grenade in the sky. I kicked the grenade on the bottom(the part that doesn't explode) and have it launch towards third boat. Once it hits its mark with a satisfying BOOM, I use my charge style to push myself towards the boat in the to see Revy with her cutlass pointed at Ching "FUCK" I yell as I stomp off grumbling about lucky pirates who got here faster because I had to take unnecessary air time.

(regular POV)

After Revy unloaded a bullet in Chings head, even though he was trying to talk her out of it, we head back to the boat. I turned to Dutch and said, "So Dutch, why don't you tell us what we're really here for." Dutch smirks

"never could get anything past those eyes huh Fox?" He puts the boat on cruise and lets it run at a smooth 32 kpm. He brings them to the table in the bridge and pulls out a map and points to a location, "We've been hired to get to a sunken ship that has a painting that was supposed to be transported to The Fuehrer Hitler's family back in WW2, never got there because french bomb boats got them with depth charges when the Germans submerged. We find it, get it, and give it to the client, simplepickup job." Naruto nodded.

Dutch decided that Naruto and Revy would be the ones to get the painting. "Hey Fox, I have to ask you something." stated Revy.

"What's on your mind Revy?" Asked Naruto

"During our little challenge, I fired a grenade at the boat you were on, but I didn't hear the explosion till later, what the hell happened." Asked Revy

"Well, well,well looks like we're connected. It's this weird thing that happens to me when I travel across dimensions."

'He still thinks I'll fall for that crap?' thought Revy.

"Whenever I get close to someone We start to think alike, kinda get into each others head, know what the other one's thinking. Like when you shot that grenade, I knew you were gonna shoot it, so I then kicked it and used it for later. Pretty cool hn?" Naruto finished

"yeah, yeah, get ready, we're over the target." Said Revy, as she double checked her water rifle, a gun that could fire underwater, and gave one to Narto. Naruto could tell she didn't believe him. He shook his head, but so long as she didn't call him on it, they would be fine.

Deep underwater Naruto and Revy saw the ship and approached. The door was easy for Naruto to open and once they entered. The came to a door that was only half submerged in water. Opening this door revealed all the lifeless corpses of the ex-nazis. Naruto and Revy decided to divide and conquer to find the fucking painting. Naruto opened one of the doors and saw the painting in the "firm" grasp of a skeleton. he went to grab it and started talking to no one in particular "Heh hello beautiful, What's beauty like you hanging around this bag of bones. Revy I found the painting!" Naruto yelled the last part, and since half of the boat was in the water, the sound carried.

5 MInutes later Revy came back with a bag "What's in the bag?"

"Silver metals." Was her simple answer

"Are you saying… you're robbing from corpses!?" Asked Naruto, he was always sensitive about people defiling the dead ever since Orochimaru made him fight his father in the chunin exams.

"We've been paid to get that painting, I figure, why not get some extra money on the side." Revy gave a feral grin and a deep chuckle after she finished.

"Revy these people used to be living beings, how would you like it if someone came to your death bed and stoll your cutlasses?" Asked Naruto a little bitterly.

Revy gave him a dead look. She gave a heave sigh and said in monotone "Look Fox let me explain how the world works. There are two forces that run this world, money and power. One is more powerful than the other, and that is money. These people are dead, they're not gonna care if you steal from them."

"Listen Revy, normally I'd be all for getting rich, but those medals are valuable to the people, and again I bring up, how would you like it if someone took your cutlass' and sold them to some random person hun?" Naruto retorted

"what ever we're taking to long, just drop this and we'll….." Revy couldn't finish as the boat got rocked by explosions.

"What the fuck is going on out there?" Naruto asked pissed. "I got the painting lets get out." You didn't have to tell Revy twice. Naruto put the painting in a waterproof bag and they both booked it to the exit, More explosions went off and Revy was lost grip on her loot, she tried to grab it but Naruto grabbed her first and swam out.

Only to be at gunpoint with a bunch of Germans. Fuck was the only word that came to my mind, Without even thinking I dive back into the water followed quickly by Revy. He turned around to see some of the neo-nazi's coming after him. He aimed his water rifle at some of the nazi's that followed them under. Naruto and Revy were kicking some serious ass, but suddenly a cannon ball came whizzing by his head. Realizing he was outgunned and out manned. He decided to surrender.

"Haha, with this painting, the next ages of Arian believers will have something to look at when we continue what the fuhrer started!" His men gave a loud celebratory shout.

Meanwhile back with the lagoon. Revy was even more pissed that they lost the painting, and had to retreat. "Please tell me we're not just gonna let them go?" She said still pissed.

"Of course we're going after it, we've got to get paid, don't we?" came the voice of Dutch.

Dutch and Revy were the ones to go out and get the painting back. Naruto and Benny were told to stay behind and keep the engine running. Appon boarding the ship, Naruto used his Eyes of True Sight to see what was going on with the two on the ship. He saw Dutch and Revy having a small argument, and he saw that neither of them noticed the nazi sneaking up on them.

Naruto rushed to the deck, pulled out a sniper rifle and without looking through the scope fired a shot that nailed the Nazi right between the eyes and scared the shit out of Revy and Dutch. Naruto continued to take pot shots at Nazi's and made Revy and Dutch look around to figure out what was happening. Then Revy heard in her head,_ "keep moving i'll cover you"_. Revy didn't question, she didn't care, she and Dutch made their way towards the captain.

Naruto went back to the hold and waited for the two to return. Benny walked up to Naruto and asked "How did you shoot all those guys? You didn't even look down the scope."

"Don't have to, my eyes of true sight tell me where to fire and I'll always hit my mark, think of my eyes as a scope I always have on." Replied Naruto as he took a puff from a sig. Half an hour later Revy and Dutch return to the ship. Revy looks and Naruto and him to her, they say nothing and go on with their separate ways and wait till they hit dry land.

"Hey Fox." called Dutch "we're running out of weapons and need to get more. We have a shipment coming from our source, you might be able to convince them to give you a gun of your own, those swords must be getting dull,I want you and Revy to go get them. That cool?"

"Sure I'll make the run. All depends on Revy." Naruto finished his smoke and pulled out another one, and offered one to Dutch.

Dutch accepts the offer and lights up "I'll go ask her." Dutch said As he walked towards where Revy was.

**(Well that was a bitch and a half to write. I now have more respect for those who have 100k+ word stories, it took alot out of me to write this. The weird thing is I have to watch an episode of the anime to get into mood to write this, I feel I can`t do this universe justice unless I'm in the right mood, I know it sounds corny but it's how I am. Sorry this came late, but next chapter we're gonna have Naruto and Revy's version of the argument, and we're gonna have the introduction to the twins of terror. Before I go, the pairing in this fic is, that Revy will have feelings for Fox, but she won't know what they are so she'll treat him differently from how she treats others, but Eda will actually develop a huge crush on Naruto(you'll see how I handle it) see ya then, oh and bonuse points if you can find the hidden Air Gear refrence, here's a hint, its only 3 lines )**


	3. Chapter 3

**(Hey guys I'm back, like I said at the end of the last chapter have Naruto reveal some of his past to Revy, not all of it, just how he was treated as a kid, now to respond to some of the reviews**

**frytrix: other people say they like it so fuck you, you don't like don't read, I'm still a noob at this so give me a break**

**Scarface101: I'll mention anyone who has an interesting review, and thx for the suggestion PM, got a good idea on how to do it**

**And to all who liked the last chapters, thanks, and sorry I don't get these out fast, I suck at writing and it takes me a while to get these out.**

**So this chapter has the argument, I hit a wall, and can't write the chapter about the twins yet, that'll be the next chapter, sorry)**

We were driving down the road leaving Roanapur. Some how I got tricked into driving Revy to this source. So I tried to lighten the mood by telling some jokes. "Ok how 'bout this one What did one hat say to the other?"

"You stay here, I'll go on ahead." Revy said causing Naruto to deflate a little.

"Ok how 'bout, what do you get when you divide a pumpkin in half by it's diameter?" Naruto tried again.

"Pumpkin pi, give it a rest Fox. Just shut up and drive, dumbass." Naruto sighed in defeat and drove. They went over a bridge that had a noose hanging from it. The noose is a message to everyone. To some it's a warning, telling them that if you cross the bridge your life is forfeit. To others it's an invitation to life of danger and excitement. Earlier, when the ship had docked. Naruto had been given directions to this alleged source Dutch mentioned, Revy was sitting shotgun, taking a smoke. She still won't talk to him, and it was starting to get annoying.

Naruto pulled up to a church, and said "interesting, what better place to hide a weapon and drug smuggling business than in plain sight." he was impressed by the incredible insight by the sister Yolanda.

Revy was banging on the door, saying "Hey y'old bitch open up, it's Rebecca. Open the damn door."

"Hey Two hands!" Came a voice from the other side of the church. It was a woman who had blonde hair, was tall, slender, and damn if she wasn't sexy, she had on the typical nun outfit, but she was chewing some bubblegum, and had on pink shades. "People like you aren't allowed in the house of God, wait for me to get sister Yolanda."

"Sister Eda, should we put the sheets in the church?" questioned one of the brothers who were moving sheets.

"No leave them in the barn, I'll pick them up later." This piqued Naruto's interest, and solidified a hunch he had.

In the small building off to the side of the church. Naruto and Revy were meeting with Sister Yolanda "So dutchy boy wants the gun shipment, well there's one small problem, the Arwen 37 grenade launcher, I'm afraid that we don't have any in stock."

"Don't fuck with us sister, just give us the gun and let us be on our way." said Revy slightly ticked.

"I'm sorry Rebecca, but you know that others want those guns as well. I can't show any favoritism."

"cut the shit y'old Bitch, just fill our order, and we won't have any problem, unless you want to count with your feet." Naruto just shook his head, the way Revy was acting is like a 5 year old who didn't get what she wanted. She nearly got shot by sister Eda who was carrying a glock 17L "Watch where you're aiming that you second rate gunman." Threatened Revy.

"If you like I can make it so you smoke out your forehead, wanna see?" Said Eda pointing her glock right between Revy's eyes.

"Now, now Eda, put those down. This isn't the place you can go pointing that thing around. We have principles here at the Church of Violence."

'well that's ironic, better put an end to this.' thought Naruto. He took a sip of the tea in front of him. "Mmm this is good sister," he takes a whiff " hmm, to get this strong of a smell, I'd say there was no tea bag, and with this flavor, is it Williamson and Magor, or is it, Fortnum and Mason?"

"you have a good sense of smell, mister…"

"just call me Fox sister, my real name doesn't matter anymore."

"very well Mister Fox, it is williamson and Magor, I do so much love black tea."

"Back in Japan, I used to live near a tea shop, because I was friends with the owner, they would let me sample teas, and even smiggle me extra shipments. It's nice to find someone who also enjoys tea like me. Speaking of smuggling, how goes the drug business?"

You couldn't see it but Eda had a raised eyebrow ' how does this kid know about the smuggling?'

"I'm afraid I don't understand what you're saying sonny, we're but a humble church not some drug dealership." Came Yolanda's response.

"Really, quick questions, do you actually believe in God?"

"yes of course."

"And how old are you?"

"43, but I must ask, what is the point of all this?"

"Your left pinky twitches when you lie sister. Only slightly, but a trained eye can find it (Or maybe a special eye). Sorry, I suppose I shouldn't jump to conclusions, it just seemed odd that you would put clean sheets into a barn, when the church would be much better suited. And there have been weird trafficking incidents, were trafficking routes have suddenly had their drugs stolen. Hotel Moscow had people to search everywhere,but they can't seem to locate the reason or the hiding place. Again this is all just theory, I don't actually have anything concrete, but it's just a theory."

Sister Yolanda looked at Naruto with a smile on her face and a hidden calculating eye. she sighs "Eda, put he grenade launcher with the rest of the guns," eda gave a es sister as she put her gun in it's holster "You intrigue me boy, if you're ever in need of someone to talk to, feel free to come by." Naruto gave a bow. "Now,it's time to pray, so be off with you."

"Before I go would you mind adding one of these to the list, I was thinking of getting two to use, and ammo for them." Naruto pulls out a Taurus judge magnum and hands it to Yolanda.

"I think we can do that, but it'll cost you extra sonny."

"Don't worry I'll cover it." Naruto gave a bow to sister Yolanda and a wink to Eda.

Naruto got up to leave, and bumped into Eda on his way out. Revy followed behind him, gave Eda a fuck you, and was about to leave, but was stopped by Yolanda "Young lady, a piece of advice, most trade can't be solved by waving a gun around."

" Go fuck yourself." was Revy's response and she walked out. Eda was going to get ready for the service, but she felt something in her had, she looked and it was a phone number and a message that said "don't call between the times of 12-3 pm" Eda smirked and shook her head.

Outside the church Naruto was looking at his own piece of paper that had a number on it and a message that said "call for a good time" he also smiled and shook his head.

Naruto decided to stop by a small stop for dinner "Damn it was packed, almost didn't get anything. better eat up, before it gets cold."

"I ain't hungry." Revy took a puff of her ciggerette

" If you don't eat you'll get the munchies."

"Give me the fuckiing keys, I'll go back myself."

"Then how would I get back?"

"You can walk."

"Not that far, I'm too lazy."

"Why don't you just go back to japan and drink your fancy tea, I won't follow you."

"And what made you think you're invited" revy just scoffed "don't get pissy with me Revy. Who stopped that meeting from turning into a blood bath?"

"When did you start talking back Fox?"

"Maybe it had something to do with the sub."

"Hey I told you not to bring that up again!"

Naruto finaly had enough of this and said "Lets get one thing straight Revy, I'm not apologizing any more"

Revy looked pissed when she heard him say that "I musta misheard you, cause you're treading dangerous territories Fox."

Naruto then stood up and slammed his hands to the table "The I'll say it again, I'm done apologizing, I've done nothing wrong."

This got Revy really pissed "It's a fucking shame. You just stepped on a non negotiable, bigass fucking landmine. So all i have is one question" She pulled out one of her guns "what do you want on your tombstone? Cocksucker?"

"How bout, you can't cure the common fool with a gun."

"Well then, nice knowing ya Fox." She pulled the trigger and sent a bullet aimed right between his eyes. But now she was absolutely livid. You'd think she's be happy, she just shot Naruto right between the eyes. Well that's the thing, she didn't. In front of her was Naruto still standing but now he had his hand in front of his face, and not just his hand, his closed hand. He twisted it so his palm was up and opened his hand revealing the bullet Revy just shot.

"See that Revy?" He positioned his other hand behind the bullet. "You can't solve all your problems with a gun." He flicks his finger, hits the bullet, the bullet whizzes past Revy's ear making it ring, the bullet hits a cup of noodles and makes it go everywhere.

Before Revy could even blink Naruto grabbed her gun and threw it to the ground. "YOU BASTARD."

Naruto grabs Revy by her shirts collar(if you can call it that), he got up in her face, and said "Who you calling bastard bitch, my name is Fox. God fucking damnit, I thought I was done bowing my head to my superiors but here I am at the end of the Earth and some bitch is asking me to do it again. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? IS THIS SOME KIND A JOKE, 'CAUSE IF IT IS I'M NOT FUCKING LAUGHING."

"You asshole, you need to learn respect."

"It's Fox, and respect, you don't get respect just because you ask for it, you earn it and the only thing that deserves my respect here is my fucking shoe. Aren't you supposed some sort of badass, a wild pirate. But from what I've seen, you're nothing but a greedy bitch who freaks out when she doesn't get what she wants."

"Don't act like you know me, you know nothing about me. All the suffering I had to go through. While you had your sheltered upbringing.."

Naruto didn't hear anything after that, he was too pissed 'sheltered upbringing, give me a fucking break' he thought.

Now he would have responded with another quip, but Revy had to go that extra mile to "prove her point" "What the hell do you know about suffering!?"

That tipped him over the edge, so he did the only logical thing. He punched Revy in the face. That shut her up, and sent her across floor. She smashed into a wall, and would have fallen if Naruto didn't have her by the throat. He said in a low, menacing voice "What do I know about suffering? Oh that was probably the worst thing you could have said to me. And why? Well maybe because I had to live through this!" Naruto took two of his fingers and touched them to Revy's head. In an instant revy saw, the worst, most disgusting things that anyone could do to human being, kicking, punching, breaking, stabbing, burning, branding, poring literal salt on the wound, burned healed only to be burned again, twisted experimentation, crucifiction, being buried alive, being burned in a literal shit hole, the list went on. But the weirdest thing was she could feel every punch, every stab, every hate filled laugh. When Revy came back to, she saw a trash can was right next to her, and lost her lunch, dinner, and breakfast all in one upchuck. After losing half her weight in barf, she turned to see Naruto holding out a water bottle. She took it, swished the water in her mouth to get rid of the extra barf still in her mouth.

"What the fuck was that?"

"That was 7 years of my childhood, instantly experienced in just 7 minutes. So I don't know about suffering, because those beating continued for 7 more years. My life was anything but sheltered Revy." Naruto looked at her with a deadpan expression.

"How the hell did you do that? Show me your past I mean." Revy asked with all the barf in her mouth gone now.

"Lets just say i can do some weird shit and leave it at that, it'll save us both a headache."

Revy sighed "You're a royal pain in the ass, ya know that? One day it'll get you killed."

"We've both had our problems, and fuck ups."

"At least I'm not a dumbass, dumbass!"

"I'm getting pissed!"

"What you gonna do? Make me see my future?"

"Hey, you two!" came a new voice.

"WHAT DO YOU WANT!?" Naruto and Revy said at the same time, while both being pissed.

"Well this certainly explains everything. I hear about a commotion in the marketplace, and it turns out to be you Revy." Said a man in a police uniform. I was the "Chief of police" Watsup, all he's here for is to get paid, nothing else. "Your gun isn't a toy you can wave around in public, cause when you do, I'm the poor sap that has to come and deal with it."

Revy sighs again "I'm guessing you want a big bribe for this chief?"

"Look I don't care what you do, just don't let me see it. You can commit mass murder as long as I don't see it i don't care. Out of sight out of mind. I had to cancel my golf game for this, I'll take you down and we'll do the paperwork." Said Watsup

"Aye-aye officer." Revy gave a salute.

Revy and Naruto got in the car, but before the did Revy turned to Watsup, and said "Hey chief don't steal our car."

"I don't want that piece of shit, come get it when you're done."

As they were driving Naruto had the passenger light his smoke. Revy then broke the silence with "Hey, Fox." Naruto glanced at her "I just need to know, who's side you're on?"

Naruto puffs his smoke, "What are you talking about Revy, I'm right here."

Revy accepts his answer and says "Hey Fox, Gimme a light."

Naruto gave her a questning look, "The cop has the lighter."

"What are you talking about, you've got one in your mouth."

Naruto understands and holds his sic in his mouth and leans towards Revy, He blows onto his cig which causes Revy's to light. He backs off and says "What a Fucked up day, I need a good fuck. Think Rowen's place is still open?"

"Probably, if you've got $1000." came revy's reply

Naruto just nodded and just stared out his window. Unaware of the small flame starting to form in his and Revy's heart.

**(Well that's done, so now i'll explain Naruto and Revy's relationship. Think o fit like this, Revy has never actually felt love,so she knows she feels differently about Naruto, but she doesn't kno what, I don't know if I should make it tourment her or not, but she will be nicer to him and not get pissed at everything he does. The next chapter will for sure have the twins in it so look forward to it. And I would like suggestions as to soem of the envents in my Naruto HOTD crossover, there are some guidelines **

**1. no one in the survivors can die. But people in the Konoha group can exept for Hinata**

**2. You can have zombies form other seriues come in, like Left for dead 1 or 2, resident evil, anyhting you can think of**

**3. You can't add andy of your OCs, That will be handled by me**

**4. anything else is fair game, if it with in my limits.**

**)**


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